Tyrone Biggums, local crack-enthusiast was nailed by crusading avenger, Beyonce Knowles as she patrolled the streets of New York while making mediocre pop music for gay guys to bump bums to while drinking $30 cocktails and telling everyone how "bootylicious" their butts are in their new jeans.
With Beyonce on the case, Amy Crackhouse better be on her guard - she aint got enough matted weave to hide her stash in anymore. Beyonce has X-ray vision and superhuman jiggle moves with which to apprehend that particular trainwreck.
The face of L'oreal, Beyonce Knowles, has become Bleachonce (thanks raincoaster at Ayyyy! for the witty wordplay) for the cosmetics giant's new ads. Her hair and skin color have been lightened to Michael Jackson proportions.
L'oreal denies any cosmetic procedures on the singer via Photoshop, but it's entirely possible that other cosmetic procedures may be responsible for Beyonce's whiter, brighter skin tone. Chemical peels and laser resurfacing can, not only even skin tone, but lighten the skin - typically, these procedures (especially Fraxel laser treatments) are often used to lighten age spots, blemishes and freckles, but they can also lighten the skin overall. Besides that, here is B looking rather bleached-out at the AMAs.
According to gay rapper - I love him! - Cazwell, B may have to have a few other things tweaked in her next ad campaign (namely, her ass). Homegirl better lay off those burgers and fries, or she's gonna be butt-jellylicious.
I Seen Beyonce At Burger King, declares the gay Eminem with help from V.I.P Party Boy, Johnny Makeup (another brilliant, openly gay rapper).
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