Don't you love Madonna? Don't you love her glamour, her fame, her extravagance? Well get ready, you lucky people, for a stay at the world-famous MadonnoLodge!
You're sheets will always be sticky and sweet - though we do not recommend you put any part of your body on them for any extended period of time, as we do not change them regularly. For your viewing pleasure, there's a wide array of fuzzy programing we intercept through the foil-covered rabbit ears off our black and white TV and your choice of scrambled porn. Our vibrating beds are a treat! They vibrate at 7 AM, 10 AM, Noon, 1 AM, and 3 AM - please check the train schedule for any delays should your bed not be vibrating at any of these times. As for dining, well you'll be set with our fine variety of vending machines (two of them working) right outside Bum Alley.
Not only do you get to live the high life in our establishment, but you can also meet Madonna's stage crew for her new Sticky and Sweet tour! They regularly stay at the MadonnoLodge while Madge entertains in her suite at whatever castle she happens to be renting.
Please Note: You will not actually meet Madonna - she wouldn't be caught dead in the same part of town as her motel (or her crew).
(Source)
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