Sunday, August 24, 2008

If New "Star Trek" Movie Sucks, There Will Be Blood

British dorks take to the streets of the UK with Klingon weapons to warn the normal, non-virgin public that the next Star Trek movie better not suck. To show their determination, they're using weapons that don't require any intellect, but do require the use of both hands.

James Martin, 47, emerged from his parent's basement in full Klingon battle gear, threatening police officers - I believe they're called bobbies across the pond - with his bat'leth while hurling insults in the Klingon language. It took two officers with arm loads of twinkies and supermarket porn to subdue the geek. Martin's mother doesn't know what got into him, she speculated that her son was only frightened from seeing the sun after years of living in the glow of the computer and television screens.

We can only pray that the spirit of Gene Roddenberry guides the making of the new movie.

Note: Yes, I made up the specifics of the story above, but terrifyingly enough officers in Gloucester have confiscated a Klingon bat'leth replica in a weapon amnesty. Also terrifying is the fact that spell check thinks I'm constantly misspelling my name, but it knows the correct spelling of 'Klingon'.


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